making an effort

In an effort to be a better blogger, I have succumbed to many requests and am now posting some belly shots and prego stats. I have to admit that I'm kinda reluctant to talk much about my pregnancy because I'm worried that I'll jinx it. I remember what it's like to be pregnant one day and not the next. And I also know what it's like to want a baby so bad, but to not be able to... all of these thoughts and concerns are with me still, even though I am currently pregnant. My particular loss and accompanying trials will always be with me. But I am grateful it happened for many reasons, too. I now realize that there is a certain someone in charge and looking out for me: Heavenly Father. And I am grateful for the chance I had to grow closer to Him. Of all people, He knows me best and has prepared me through trials and blessings. What a blessing it is that things have worked out for the better. And what a blessing it is to have my eyes opened and my heart softened to those who have trials of their own. To those who have suffered in the past and those who may currently be suffering: I love you, and God loves you. Your courage, perseverance, and strength cannot be measured in this lifetime, but only in the next. Thank you for your wonderful examples to me and other silent observers. I can only pray that some day may be a happier one, if not in this life, then certainly the next.

With that said, I am now 22 weeks pregnant. Or in other words, I am five months along and more than half-way done! It really is crazy how fast it's gone. I'm worried that I haven't enjoyed or appreciated it as much as I should have, even after all I've gone through. It makes me feel like a spoiled brat... but I really am happy and thankful. Things continue to go well. According to today's weigh in, I've gained a total of 8 pounds and I'm right on schedule. We had an ultrasound a few weeks ago and everything looked great. And before anyone else asks, WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT WE'RE HAVING. This means that Brad wants to be surprised and I am supporting him. I personally would love to know, because I'm a planner. But I'm at peace with OUR decision and am excited to meet this mystery baby. So please, no comments about how I should be sneaky and find out what we're having :)

Also, we've decided that we're allowed to stare at the ultrasound for as long as we want in an effort to guess if we're having a boy/girl -- not having the tech tell or confirm the sex. And we did just that! We stared and stared and we think we know... William was so very obvious that we knew he was a he before the tech even said a word! With this one, it was more like an empty trough (maybe three lines?). So, according to our hypothesis, we might be having a girl! But we don't know for certain, and we won't know until she/he is born. And before anyone else asks, my next ultrasound is at 32 weeks. And yes, we will be staring and guessing again ;)

Wow, this is turning into a major post... so without further ado, on to the part you've all been waiting for: belly shots! Just so you know, I have officially popped as of two days ago. Here are two pictures, within five days of each other (the one on the left was taken in a tent in Anthro with a cellphone, and the one on the right I blame on our poor bathroom lighting).

It's amazing how you can go from looking thick in the middle to obviously preggers almost overnight. Kind of disturbing, but mostly fascinating. The human body really is amazing. And I thank God for it everyday. *B