3.25.2009

birth stories, with lots of etceteras

First, a little background information: Will was born via Cesarean. I know, it seems so unlike me; anti-Beth, if you will... but Will didn't drop and was a stubborn breech baby. Even after three versions, he refused to stay head down, etc. In fact, the morning we went in to have him, he was head down! Oh, if you could imagine the grief those nasty nurses gave me. Thank goodness I had a wonderful, supportive, and patient doctor-midwife team. And after many tears and prayers (again), we went ahead with our decision and wouldn't you know! Will flipped within those 45 minutes and was delivered feet first. Once he was out, the anesthesiologist must have given me something because I was knocked out for the remainder of the surgery and they had to wake me up from my super groggy state in recovery to start nursing my baby boy.

Now, Elsie's story is similar but so very different. She too was a spinning crazy breech baby who refused to drop, etc. The nurse practitioner that I had been seeing (I was just going to a clinic, due to a lack of serious moolah) agreed with my past midwife, saying that it just wasn't likely that my babies would fit through my small and sharp little pelvis... also, the hospital and doctor that I was going to be delivering with would not allow a VBAC. Once again, I sacrificed my ideals on behalf of the health of my baby, and myself. Brad and I decided that because our situation was less than ideal (no access to a midwife and/or chiropractor, past experiences with pregnancies/surgeries, etc.), that we would go ahead with a repeat C-section. Once again, many tears and prayers flowed from my person...

The doctor who was to deliver Elsie would not even allow me to go into labor on my own. Not something he was even willing to risk, so they scheduled me a week before my due date. Now, this due date was based off of my early ultrasounds (6 and 18 weeks), not my LMP. I begged with the clinic, tried switching doctors/hospitals, but no one would push back the section. In the end, Elsie was born on March 11th, at a supposed 39 weeks gestation. She came out tiny, and covered in vernix. I knew she was early. And I wish the medical field would place a little more faith in a mother's intuition... thank goodness she was still considered full term, if not on the small side. The pediatric nurse confirmed my suspicions saying she looked like she was 38 weeks, not 39 weeks. Dumb doctor(s) et al.

Anyway, now for the more positive side of her story. My nurse was amazing and apparently was a huge proponent of skin to skin bonding, even for Cesarean mothers. So, she told my anesthesiologist to not give me the knock out drug, basically to keep me awake --of course I still had the spinal, so it's not like I was in any pain. I was just kept awake the ENTIRE time. This time around, my baby came out and I stayed awake while they sewed me up. I got to hear her cry and all the conversations going around, etc. And then, they came and plopped her on my chest! She immediately calmed down and started rooting around. I got to hold her the entire time, even when they transferred me from the operating table to the recovery gurney. And then, she stayed with me for HOURS in the recovery room while we waited for a room. The only bad thing is I got really sick from the drugs and was dry heaving and sweating for a few hours. I only had that a little with William after I woke up... I think the stuff they usually give you to knock you out afterward helps you sleep through the drug aftermath... but still, totally worth it!

And now, two weeks later, my beautiful daughter is packing on the pounds and basking in her family's love-glow! I know that our bodies are living miracles. I know that our bodies have the strength to complete tasks beyond our comprehension. And I know that our bodies interact on various levels with various environments --mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual. I may not have delivered my babies ideally, but I have carried each of them for nine months. And I can provide nourishment and comfort via nursing. I can make difficult decisions to get them here safely. And I can love them and support them. I am their mother, and no one can take that away from me. It is my God-given right and I know that motherhood is a divine calling; one that I embrace with open arms and a full heart.

I am so grateful that I have two beautiful, happy and healthy children and that my body has the strength to recover from what it goes through to get them here. *B

27 comments:

  1. Yay! Happy to have heard your delivery story. I wonder if they'll let me stay away after my second c-section, instead of knocking me out like they did the first time. Cute pics! Hope your recovery is going well.

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  2. You are so amazing and such a good mommy. Isnt it amazing how much we can pray for, laugh for, cry for our little ones so much, even before we actually meet them!! I am so glad that you got to spend those precious after delivery moments with your little one and create those beautiful memories. I am so glad that you are feeling better and recovering quickly... you are amazing!

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  3. Yahoo! She's so beautiful and I'm so glad that everything went well. You are my hero! Love you bad! XOXO

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  4. I'm so happy to hear the happy ending to your birth stories. Your babies are so adorable! :)

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  5. Beth - she's beautiful! Congratulations!!

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  6. Congrats on your new little one - glad everything went well!

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  7. I think as women we have to come to realize that things just don't go how we picture them or how we think we want them. But, if we really think about it what is it we want? I know the most important thing to me is that my babies get here safe and sound. I always think about all those poor pioneer women who didn't have what we have available to us and how many lost their babies or their own lives through birth. Oh, how lucky we are to live in this time! I am glad that you and little Elsie came through alright and that everyone is healthy and happy!
    I have to add that my three previous deliveries have left me so traumatized that I am kind of hoping I can just be knocked out this time around and woken up when it is all over! I am terrified of going through another "natural" or drug free delivery, but I am just as terrified of the drugs! I'm down to my last couple months now and I don't think that is enough time to prepare for this one. But, like I said before, my main concern is that me and my baby get through it safely.
    Anyway, sorry for the long comment. Elsie is adorable and I am glad everything went well for you! :)

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  8. Your story makes me cry. What a great mom you are and your babies are truly blessed to be were they are. she is a sweetheart.

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  9. She is exceptional. And so are you. Congratulations, woman!

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  10. Thanks for all the details Beth, you are awesome. It was fun having Will come along today.

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  11. Oh she is so dang cute. COngratulations! I love the quilt your mom made you and I see her laying on it in the pic below. So cute!

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  12. I have tears in my eyes, B! I think that is awesome that you were able to hold her right away, and for so long at that. And I totally agree about rather going through the pain than missing out on those first precious hours. Also I have to agree with you that it is so interesting that no matter how we give birth to our children, and whether or not it's our ideal situation, they are still the same babies forever and ever and it doesn't change the fact that we are their mommies. And I think your babies have a great mommy :)

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  13. It is amazing what our bodies can do huh? I'm so happy that she is here safe and sound!

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  14. Personally, I suspect a Cesarean birth is less traumatic and much more comfortable for baby. Mom, on the other hand, has it pretty rough!

    Elsie came looking like a perfect baby doll... no cone-head like Kenzie! Poor Isaac burst a blood vessel in his eye... yuck.

    She looks happy and healthy... congratulations!

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  15. That is so sweet that you got to sit and bond with her! Every girl/mother's dream :) What a special experience.

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  16. I never knew all that about Will's delivery. I can't believe they knocked you out afterwards -- they didn't do that with mine. That would seriously bug! I'm glad it was better with Elsie! When are you coming home so we can all see her?

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  17. I'm so glad things went reasonably well. I hope you are enjoying your time with your two cuties. Love ya!

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  18. Congratulations and thanks for your delivery story. She is beautiful and so is her name!

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  19. I LOVE your thoughts about motherhood and brith! I am so glad that Elsie's arrival included time with you right away! What a special time! (If you ever have to deal with anesthesia again, mention your nausea, because they have things they can add to your cocktail that help. It makes all the difference for me!)

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  20. great summary of feelings and the details beth! With my 3 c-sections, I wasn't knocked out with any. And they were in 3 different doctors in 3 different hospitals. I'll have to ask my doctor about that with my next one. And I do remember I nearly threw up on the operating table so they quickly added something to my I.V. that helped immensely. Every experience is so different isn't it. You are a great mom and I hope your recovery goes well. It is amazing what they can do with modern medicine to deliver those breech babies (hannah was breech too). And it is amazing how well our bodies handle everything. Congrats on your newest cutest babe.

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  21. I miss my babies--all three of you!! You do a beautiful job creating children. Thank you for the most wonderful gifts! Take care of yourself and them.

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  22. Beth I love you! Can't wait to see all of you... I'll call you probably tomorrow =)

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  23. I can't even begin to tell you how happy I am for you guys! Glad it all worked out okay in the end. What a BEAUTY!!

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  24. She's so beautiful and I'm so glad everything went so well!!! I know exactly what you're talking about and the tears you shed for not being able to deliver both babies "naturally". I HAD to do two c-sections as well and that wasn't my first choice either. Even though we couldn't deliver "the natural" way, we still delivered them. It's a wonderful blessing to be able to be mothers, no matter how we deliver them.

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  25. Some great posting Beth! Congrats! She is beautiful and you are a wonderful mother!

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  26. What amazing stories! How blessed you are to have 2 healthy babies! I am sure that you are an amazing mother to your children! Your children are ADORABLE! I hope that you are recovering quickly! Enjoy your little ones!

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  27. Thank you for sharing your stories. I hope it encourages so many women who find themselves in your position.

    She is beautiful. Congratulations.

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You're currently in the process of making my day. So thanks for that! *B