a simple Christmas wish

This year, Christmas will be a very simple one for us. But it is not the simplest Christmas ever. May we all remember the Gift that was given that first Christmas, long ago: our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I am grateful for Him; for His birth, His life, and His death. Through Him we are blessed with another Gift, the greatest of all the gifts of God: eternal life with our eternal families.

No fancy pictures, cards, or presents for us...
Just a simple wish for a Merry Christmas from our family to yours!
With Love,
The Summers Family

today

Today is the 18th of December, 2008.
Today is a list day.
So, today:

• is like every other day, meaning I'm tired
• it's a clear, sunny, and brisk 47 degrees
• my maybe baby would be 7 months and 1 week old
• I am 27 weeks along, getting bigger and much more uncomfortable
• my fully potty trained son decided the carpet = the toilet
• is the last day of finals (only one semester left)!!!

And finally, but certainly not least, today leaves us with a week until Christmas! I have something fun/festive planned for each of the remaining seven days... today we make a small chain of red, white and green to start the count down :) And tomorrow? Tomorrow is another day. *B

just a glimpse

Ok, so I felt really guilty and bah-humbuggy after that last post. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep without putting something somewhat pleasant and festive up! In summary, I'm not always lazy, or raunchy. I do have decorations up, a smile on my face and I've even finished my Christmas shopping! So there. *B

make up your own title

Most anything nowadays sends me into a panic mode. This includes, but is not limited to, Blogger, Twitter, Facebook, Ravelry and even Gmail. Or anything related to computers... that, especially, is whacko. My computer is like my second (soon to be third) child! So I am currently in the habit of being lazy and just saying "no" to anything (or anyone, sadly) that requires much of my attention. It's a miracle the house hasn't burned down. Yet.

Sorry, no pictures and no stories about how this is our last year here, how all three of us Summers have celebrated our birthdays, and/or how we have decked our halls for the holidays! Someday I will, and maybe some day soon (tomorrow?!).

But not now, because it makes me panic. *B

tonight at midnight

me + friends + Edward = a good time!

And check out my new blog song :)
Man, I love being a dork. *B

freaking out much

I don't know who Miss Kim thinks she is, but she's obviously crazy! I mean, yeah, I like to make all sorts of stuff, because it's fun. But me?! I don't really fit in with all the other inspirational geniuses she's featured... I just keep shaking my head, feeling sorry for her bout of insanity ;)

If you haven't already checked out Today's Creative Blog, then please do so now. There really is a lot of eye candy over there. I just happen to feel like the brussels sprout of the bunch, HA! And thanks much, Kim. You rocked my socks today! *B

happiness is...

I know the day of thanks is coming up fast (where in the hey did the month go?!), and many have posted their thankfuls. Along those lines, I've been thinking a lot lately about what makes me happy. I'm still in love with our not-so-new (anymore) new place and I still find myself smiling at things around my home. We may not live in a house, and who knows when we will! But I'm glad I've been able to make a home for me and my family; a place where we can find peace and comfort in a time where our lives are still full of uncertainties... so, here are just a few things in and around my abode that make me happy:

my family room

especially my couch (thanks Andrea!) AND my newish pillows (thanks mom!)

my happy little tree towels

my sewing machine; she's a CHAMP!
I've got lots of fun things in store for you Miss Kenmore ;)

and most of all, this face!

See, so much to be thankful for! And believe me, I am :)
So, what brings you happiness this fine season? *B

making an effort

In an effort to be a better blogger, I have succumbed to many requests and am now posting some belly shots and prego stats. I have to admit that I'm kinda reluctant to talk much about my pregnancy because I'm worried that I'll jinx it. I remember what it's like to be pregnant one day and not the next. And I also know what it's like to want a baby so bad, but to not be able to... all of these thoughts and concerns are with me still, even though I am currently pregnant. My particular loss and accompanying trials will always be with me. But I am grateful it happened for many reasons, too. I now realize that there is a certain someone in charge and looking out for me: Heavenly Father. And I am grateful for the chance I had to grow closer to Him. Of all people, He knows me best and has prepared me through trials and blessings. What a blessing it is that things have worked out for the better. And what a blessing it is to have my eyes opened and my heart softened to those who have trials of their own. To those who have suffered in the past and those who may currently be suffering: I love you, and God loves you. Your courage, perseverance, and strength cannot be measured in this lifetime, but only in the next. Thank you for your wonderful examples to me and other silent observers. I can only pray that some day may be a happier one, if not in this life, then certainly the next.

With that said, I am now 22 weeks pregnant. Or in other words, I am five months along and more than half-way done! It really is crazy how fast it's gone. I'm worried that I haven't enjoyed or appreciated it as much as I should have, even after all I've gone through. It makes me feel like a spoiled brat... but I really am happy and thankful. Things continue to go well. According to today's weigh in, I've gained a total of 8 pounds and I'm right on schedule. We had an ultrasound a few weeks ago and everything looked great. And before anyone else asks, WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT WE'RE HAVING. This means that Brad wants to be surprised and I am supporting him. I personally would love to know, because I'm a planner. But I'm at peace with OUR decision and am excited to meet this mystery baby. So please, no comments about how I should be sneaky and find out what we're having :)

Also, we've decided that we're allowed to stare at the ultrasound for as long as we want in an effort to guess if we're having a boy/girl -- not having the tech tell or confirm the sex. And we did just that! We stared and stared and we think we know... William was so very obvious that we knew he was a he before the tech even said a word! With this one, it was more like an empty trough (maybe three lines?). So, according to our hypothesis, we might be having a girl! But we don't know for certain, and we won't know until she/he is born. And before anyone else asks, my next ultrasound is at 32 weeks. And yes, we will be staring and guessing again ;)

Wow, this is turning into a major post... so without further ado, on to the part you've all been waiting for: belly shots! Just so you know, I have officially popped as of two days ago. Here are two pictures, within five days of each other (the one on the left was taken in a tent in Anthro with a cellphone, and the one on the right I blame on our poor bathroom lighting).

It's amazing how you can go from looking thick in the middle to obviously preggers almost overnight. Kind of disturbing, but mostly fascinating. The human body really is amazing. And I thank God for it everyday. *B

because it's important

It's time for me to change things up a bit with this lil' ol' blog o' mine... I want to record more of our lives; of my life. I need, and want, a journal. Time is really passing me by and so is my memory! I need to be better about remembering and recording important dates, people and thoughts. It -the blog- may be more personal (and therefore more boring/interesting, depending on you as a reader), but it will remain public. I have a life that's worth remembering. I am a woman: a daughter, a wife, a mother, and a friend. I'm also creative: a writer, a picture taker (need to be better!), and an overall crafter. And while I have projects/talents to share, I also have thoughts, memories and beliefs that are worth sharing.

This is my life and it's important to me. *B

standing for something

I'm proud of our country and of the freedoms we have as a people. I pray that the decisions that we help influence as a people, and the leader we elect as a people (whoever it may be), will all have the support from us, the people. God be with us all, in the choices we make and in what we the people stand for. *B

to whom it may interest

I'm on Twitter now. I think, subconsciously, it is one of my life's missions to belong to every online community available. With the exception of Myspace. No thanks. Anyway, I find something strangely relaxing and poetic about the writing of short, random sentences. I'll just leave it at that. *B

it's time

We've been potty training for three days now...

Side note: Have I ever mentioned how much I hate the word "potty"???
HATE it. I'd rather say pee/poo. And we do. That is all.

Anyway, we have had some accidents, but nothing too bad. I think that part is unavoidable. I'm just glad we have a washer/dryer in this place! I've also got a sticker chart + candy + new underwear, which will hopefully = success! It's definitely trying my patience, though. Every 30 minutes for a bathroom break really takes its toll... but it needs to be done. After all, it's time. *B

photo by limonada

a rolling pumpkin gathers no moss...

I love pumpkins. And I absolutely adore Autumn! October happens to be my favorite month, too. The colors, the air, the quiet, the pace and of course, THE holiday! You better believe we've got our costumes in the works ;)

So yay for Fall and all it entails! Here's a little freebie for you to celebrate the season: it's a festive desktop wallpaper, and it happens to match my Spook Alpha and Sweetly Sinister paper pack. I designed all of these last year... but since that October was less than ideal, I'm busting out the goodies now. Consider it an early treat (not a trick)!

If it tickles your fancy, you can snatch the Fall Wall Freebie here:
http://www.4shared.com/file/66105787/5b359471/bsummers_Fall-WallFreebie.html

Also sweet: my new blog song! Love Kate Nash, almost as much as I love pumpkins :) I'm off to AZ for a week, and hopefully when I get back I'll have those pictures I've been talking about... and a lot more to share, too. But in the meantime, happy Fall y'all! *B

photo by Robin

what rhymes with worm?

Squirm does. And my little apple baby is squirming!
No kicking yet, just butterfly squirms. It's fun.
I've missed baby movements. It's my favorite.
Next week my little applet will be an avocado baby.
And then I'll be almost four months along...
time flies when you're having fun; fun with squirms! *B

photo by Jenna. Thanks J!

the nitty gritty

I'm so overwhelmed and busy with patent work that my graphic design side business has been put on the back burner. So sorry to some who feel like I've forgotten them; it's not true! I remember and my conscience is eating away at me --not to mention my complete failure as host of a couple giveaways and the one swap, all from times long since past! I will get to all of them, eventually. I promise. One step at a time, though. First step, designing all those designs I said I would! Also, I noticed that I still have two spots open ;)

1. Joe - baby announcements
2. Marcie - header
3. Clarissa - blog makeover
4. Lacey - blog design
5. Rachel H. - blog design
6. Leslie - ???
7. Aranne - blog design
8. Mandi - something (possibly a decor board)!
9. your name here
10. your name here

Also, for those who have asked about my pricing:

BLOGS
Blog header: $25
Blog background: $25
Sidebar titles: $25
Blog Design/Makeover: $60-75

CARDS, ETC.
$50 design fee

CUSTOM GRAPHICS
$20-35 hourly rate

And the quilt board was custom made for my mom's quilt group (please contact me if you're interested in a board design. Feel free to contact me to say hi, too! :) I'm a little into quilting nowadays myself... 'tis the season! Seriously, I've got fabric and crochet on the brain; my creative juices are flowing again, yay! Oh, and next week: updating all the links on my sidebars AND posting pictures of what we've been up to for the past month or two! We've been a little on the busy/stressed side of life, in case you couldn't tell... but all is good. Especially my little apple baby! *B

this stinks...

PATENTS SUCK!!!
That is all. *B

until next time

I have officially earned the worst blogger award! So sorry for being so lame and not updating frequently. Things are good, though. Still pregnant :) I'm just swamped with work, side projects and two sickies! Hopefully I'll get some extra time and motivation to post some pictures and/or some worthwhile reading. Until then... *B

finally

The camera is unloaded! Now I have the necessary memory to take pictures, which means this blog will be less boring (hopefully). Although, as to whether or not I have the necessary memory myself to remember to take pictures is an entirely different story... just wanted to share this trivial information with you before I'm off to do laundry, lasagna, cupcakes and FHE. Also, we had a tarantula on our porch today. No, I do not have a picture of it and I do not want to talk about it further! [shudders]

Bday pics of the birthday boys to come later this week! *B

time for an update

Holy guacamole, it's almost been a month since my last post! Sheesh. I suppose that means I should probably write something, before I lose any more readers. Or before my mother shoots me... whichever comes first. Just so you know, my camera is full of pictures that I have yet to transfer from five months ago. So, no new pictures, just a boring post. Also, I've had a LOT on my mind lately. Here's just a sampling:

whining about...
1. just trying to stay alive right now. Last month was beastly and this month looks to be the same, but worse. We are officially broke. No cash, credit or loans left over to live on. It seems like we have nothing but debt. It sucks.
2. feeling sick, exhausted and starving. All the time. Not necessarily in that order, though...

dreaming about...
1. money, obviously. Because then we could pay rent + utilities. And then I could get this, this and this/this. Food would be nice, too.
2. a baby girl. Her name is Elizabeth Rae Summers, but she goes by Elsie-Rae. She has blue eyes and brown, wavy hair. She also sleeps through the night.

lucky about...
1. jobs. Even though we live from paycheck to paycheck, it's better than nothing. I am hyper aware of how blessed we really are.
2. being pregnant. I am just about 9 weeks along and am due late-mid-March (like, the 19th). A couple of weeks ago we had an ultrasound to rule out another ectopic pregnancy. Good news abounds, because the baby is indeed where it needs to be (my uterus)! We also got to see the tiny heart flutter and hear it beat, too. I just hope and pray that things continue to get better, and in seven months I'll have my baby! And yes, I would be perfectly happy if she turned out to be a he, instead ;) Oh, and I haven't thrown up yet. Definitely lucky about that!

And for what it's worth, I thought Breaking Dawn was awesome! It basically rocked my socks. Time to find a new obsession... *B

three meanings...

makes for a REAL long post! It means three things. Also, it makes for a lot of "super" usage. You ready? You sure? You're sure you're sure? Ok, here we go:

1. Binary code. In other words, computer talk. And yes, at one point in my life I used to be able to read it... but in this case, it signifies my jobs that rely on my computer. First job: designer for Writing on the Wall. I've hinted at it before and I think it's safe to mention it now, because they're at market! Anyway, I've designed a handful of home decor boards for the lovely duo and they're being sold in boutique stores. Super excited! I just send them designs I come up with, they freak out and buy them, and then MY design is printed on wooden boards and sold in home boutique stores (my mom happens to work at such a store). I've also tried my hand at designing some other things for other people, but I have to keep my lips zipped on that for a while longer...


Second job: kicks butt! I've been officially hired on at Brad's firm in Malibu as a patent drawings draftsman. The extra money is killer (I make marginally less than Brad does, and he's a patent agent!), but the best part is I get to work from home! A couple hours a day really helps repair the dents in our wallets. It's not near as fun/pretty as things I've done in the past, but it is by far the best job I've had to date. Super lucky! Basically, my computer has become my best friend. Perhaps I should brush up on my computer speak...


2. Serious nerdism. I think it's safe to say that I'm a geek. Pretty sure I've made that pretty clear ever since I admitted to being a huge dork... but what's more is that our little family is going to Comic-Con next week!!! I've always secretly wanted to go, and now I am. Oh man, I'm excited. And nervous. Because I just happen to be going the same day when the author, director and actors of Twilight will be there. Not to mention all the super heroes, action figures, and dorkier dorks that are sure to dazzle us. Super cool! I've already been daydreaming up t-shirt designs for the three of us. Yes, Will is going with us. The indoctrination must start while he's still young.


3. And finally, but certainly not least, my eggo is preggo! It's true my friends --after almost a year of trying, succeeding, failing, waiting and trying again-- I am indeed just barely pregnant :D I've decided to share the news early because, truth be told, I need and appreciate a good support system. I'm being careful, trying to curb my enthusiasm because I really don't know what will happen these next few months. Hopefully nothing but a growing and healthy baby... but for now, all is well! I'm super happy. And always hungry. And very, very hopeful.

So there you have it! *B

photo by trikeratops

take a guess

What does it mean?
I'll tell you later...
because I'm mean.

Also, I'm kinda excited. *B

photo by Rakka

post script

I'm pretty sure I'm the worst blogger, right now! Forget posting regularly. Forget commenting regularly. Forget contests, or swaps. Shoot, forget Bloglines! And I can't guarantee that I'll be/get better anytime soon... but there are a few things I wanted to add since my last post. So here goes:

First off, we are poorer than dirt. I've never been so worried about money as I am now. These past few weeks and looking into the coming month is nothing short of frightening. However, we've been extremely blessed and things have just worked out, miraculously. Thanks to the law of tithing! Wow. Anyway, so I've been busting my butt to make a few bucks, ever since we got back from all our traveling. I'm venturing out more and more into the graphic design world and so far, so good. And hopefully next week, I can give you more details about what's been keeping me so busy. But busy is good, because it means money. And we need money. Now, more than ever.

Also, I am not pregnant. Just thought I would answer that question a bit more clearly. Yes, I wish I was, but apparently someone up high has some other plans for us. I'm trying to come to grips with said plan, and for most of the time I'm right on board with it. But then there are the times where no matter how logical I am (you know, realizing how lucky I am to already have a son and that there may be a darn good reason as to why I haven't had another one yet, etc.), it doesn't change the fact that I want a baby. I'm ready, waiting, and still wanting. So yeah.

And I am honestly amazed that there are people out there that like Apple Jacks! No offense. but I really don't care for them. And before you say/write anything, it has NOTHING to do with the fact that it's a sugar cereal. Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Cocoa Crispies just so happen to be amongst my favorites! But Apple Jacks? Bluck. Anyway, thanks to everyone for answering my random question :)

Oh, and if you're interested in learning about what I've been reading, then be my friend on GoodReads. Good stuff. Good times. And now I'm off to read some more, and be with my brother. Did I forget to mention that he's been visiting with us for the past week? Oh, and WALL-E is AMAZING. Go see it. *B

PS- to anyone who might be interested: I'm working on building up my portfolio in graphic design. So, to the first ten people, I will help design your blog/website, t-shirt, cards/invitations/announcements or anything else you can think of, for free! Email me with any requests or questions. Help me, help you ;)

trying to stay sane...

{photo by Robin}

I'm back. From traveling, that is. I'm also back in laundry valley... honestly, I don't feel like doing anything. At all. Except read. I've been doing a lot of that lately. It's my way of hiding from the world. From things like laundry. And poverty. And pizza face. And non-pregnancy. And the HEAT! What else is there to do but lock yourself inside with your television, books, and bored (needy) child? And all of this leads me to wonder: who actually likes Apple Jacks???

No, really. I want to know. *B

pathetic, i know

My little monkey just asked me for a shirt, because he was "cold." The nerve of that child, expecting his mother to dress him! What's next? Begging me to change his diaper?! Wait, he already does...

Time to get off the comp and back to laundry [sigh]. *B

boy howdy: a travel log

Sheesh and man alive, I am beat! And then some. I can't even remember what I've been up to these past few weeks, but I'll try my best to recollect... so we were up in Washington for a while and came home for a day to ourselves. Then one of my BFF's came for a few days; what a treat! A day after her departure, we had a little shindig with some buddies before they left, and a couple of days later we headed out for Utah. Brad had some business to attend to and we had some family and friends to visit. It's been far too long, but we finally got to spend some quality time with grandparents, sister/brother and nephews/cousins for a week (Monk was in heaven, and frankly, so was I. Thanks Ellen for being the sister I always wanted!). I'm not even sure if the hub was able to get enough work done, which was the main reason we headed out that way...

I was also able to meet up with my pals from the web, Jbird (who graciously took some amazing family photos) and Lacey (who is officially THE cutest and sweetest pregnant lady I've ever met). Much fun, but too short a visit, gals! Oh, and we also made a quick stop in St. George to see my lovely Aunt S. AND Brad has some family in Vegas that we got to spend some time with and we're already planning on future trips to Sin City, in the next year or so... you know, to slip some coins into slots and window shop for a possible home. We'll see how far temptation takes us ;)

Wait, I'm not finished, yet! Now that we're home for a few days, I'm attempting to move mountains of laundry (I seriously have like, 50-odd loads), take a test, fulfill some orders and finish up some fun and exciting projects that I still haven't even mentioned yet! Don't even ask me how many emails and blogs I have to go through... Then, come Monday it's a day at Dland with my family, followed by a huge Borgia reunion up in Sacramento. Basically, when we get back next Saturday (?) I plan on locking myself in my apartment until Comic-Con (yup, still as dorky as ever; I'm also lame and feeling fat).

Oh, and gas prices (now $4.50) do NOT help in all of this traveling... also, we are poorer than dirt. But, we have discovered that Arby's makes some killer subs! *B

stuck behind the moon

I'm hiding. That's what I tell people, my reason as to why I haven't written for so long (mostly this guy, and him, too). Ok, not really. I'm just doing things other than blogging... am I really missed, though? I'm still waiting for my induction amongst the real heroes. If only I had a super power, like mind reading, or hypnotic writing... but really, I'm just getting out more.

My apologies, but I'm quite enjoying my unintentionally prolonged blogging break... not posting unless I feel like it; it's quite exhilarating at times. *B

PS- new theme song ;)

that's what she said

All right, here's the deal: I've been away from home for the past week or two. I'm up in Seattle (which I'd forgotten how much I loved) with the hub's family. Good people. Good times. And anytime I go on vacation, I go into an unplanned blog hiatus. That means my posting on and reading of blogs (and commenting) grinds to a halt. With the exception of the Twilight Lexicon blog, of course. My obsessive nerdiness, for one, is not influenced by location. However, my weight is, and I am so kicking my butt into high gear when I get home... also, it is really, REALLY, unfair to feel pregnant when you're not. But I am glad that my nasty head cold is finishing up. Not so glad about my asthmatic lungs. Also, Iron Man is wicked awesome. Wow. Oh, and I need to cut my bangs. Again.

I'll be back to regular posting, both logical and nonsensical, in a few days...
I love me some vacay! *B

May 11th, 2008

I could have given birth today. I could be nursing, right now, too. And again in two hours... I would also be recovering from another Cesarean, most likely. But I would have had my baby. Time sure does fly, whether you're having fun or not. Honestly, I felt like this day would be forever in coming. And I worried that once it came, I'd be a wreck. I'm not, though. Surprisingly. I'm sad, disappointed. And confused. But I'm okay.

I'm also a mother to another wonderful, sweet (moody), healthy boy. So happy mother's day to me! And to all the other wonderful women out there, who love as mothers do (because a baby doesn't make a mother; love does). And I'm grateful to have the love of my wonderful mothers, and the love of my child. *B

geeking out

It's confession time, my dear friends. And I do hope we can still be friends after what I'm about to tell you. You're sure to look at me differently. Here goes... I'm a total nerd. I mean, really, a full blown geek. Let me lay it all out for ya (in no particular order) and do or don't laugh, because it's all true...

1. I have glasses. And I like them.
2. I grew up playing with my brother's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as much as I played with dolls. I also read comic books and Goosebumps more frequently than I read Anne of Green Gables, etc.
   
3. I used to read about and sketch fairies with elaborate wings, obsessively.
   
4. Most of the guys I dated or hung out with were either huge video gamers or computer programmers. My husband happens to be both.
5. I once considered getting a minor in Computer Science in college. I took one course (CS 124), was one of two girls in attendance, did surprisingly well and ended up with an A in the class and was offered a tutoring position. My own tutor and teacher practically begged me to stay in the program...
6. I used to be able to read binary, assembly language, and basic C++
7. I currently understand a bit of html and can code my own stuff, with a little help from the web et al.
8. I frequently read and can appreciate/understand 90% of the webcomic xkcd
9. I have a kick trash, screaming fast computer that is not only useful for all of my graphic design projects, but also comes in real handy whenever I feel like playing this game. My character's name is Rhea and I'm a wood elf. But I only play in God Mode...
10. I really, truly want to play Dungeons & Dragons. The real-live version, not the video game (which I have played).
    
11. I admittedly feel more comfortable scrapbooking digitally rather than with paper
12. I love the Renaissance Festival and have been dying to go back ever since my first field trip there, despite the Arizona heat, that's how much I love it. However, I did go to a jousting tournament In Bellevue, last summer. That was fun.
    
13. Firefly is one of my favorite shows. I wish it would come back.
14. I'm still freaking out (happily) that the geniuses behind BSG finally decided to kill off Cally. She was fracking annoying! ;)
    
15. I've always secretly wanted to go to this, and I am seriously considering going this year. You know, in an effort to fully embrace my nerdhood.
    
16. Galaxy Quest is by far, one of my most favorite movies. Ever.
17. Lord of the Rings is my favorite book. Dracula is my second. I'm a sucker for anything magika and/or vampire, pun not intended.
18. Speaking of which, I cannot even begin to tell you how many times I've read the Twilight series. It's not THE best book ever (please see #17), but it is a fun and easy read (please, don't think less of me dearest Rob). But honestly, vampires and teenage romance? I was doomed from the beginning. It seems as though Stephenie Meyer manufactures my brand of heroin ;) I also secretly subscribe to and frequently stalk any fansites out there... and DUDE! They're making a movie!!! Seriously geeking out over this, this, and this. Oh yeah, AND this:
    

I've already got plans in the making for a book signing expedition AND a tour of Forks, La Push, etc. Who's with me???

BUT, I do speak plain English (sans Middle Earth accent) and can dress myself (in clothing other than mithril armor). Also, I have not and never will work at McDonald's. So, can we still be friends? *B

may day

is the day we were wed. We, as in me and Brad (the hub). And we have been blissfully married for four years, now. Honestly, we really are happy together. I think we could count how many fights we've had on one hand, with fingers to spare! No joke. We have yet to get tired of each other. Crazy.

Simply put, this man of mine just makes me smile, every morning. He has since day one. And he will continue to do so for forever...

Thank you for that, honey. And thanks for so much more. *B

nopity, nopity noo

My favorite phrase (Name that movie!) to use in place of NO...

For those of you who were wondering, I am NOT pregnant.

Better luck next time? *B

PS-photo taken by Monk, himself. No joke.

salivate much?

I know everyone and their dog has probably seen this already, but I've got to do my own selfish part! The dear and lovely Camille has a sa-weet give-away going on. I can't believe she's going to willingly give up one of her gorgeous quilts to some person! Wow. I mean, WOW! But if she is, then I hope that person is me! I already told her that there's no one out there in the world that would love it more than me. Seriously. Then grab a bib to catch all that slobbery goo your mouth is bound to release and then check it out.

And tell her I sent you! *B

clarification

"I wish that I could bake a cake made out of rainbows and smiles, and we'd all eat it and be happy."
Mother bloggers unite!!!

I never said that there is anything wrong with a mom blog. I was simply saying that I (me, myself) choose to stay public, but am also aware of the fact that unknown others might come across my blog. That is why I do not feel comfortable posting certain things. If you happen to be the kind of person who likes to share intimate stories and/or pictures about yourself and loved ones AND if you happen to be worried about who may be looking at your web log, then maybe going private is right for you. I, however, want to stay public so I choose to filter my own content, only posting what I feel is safe.

What you blog about is up to you. Not me. And I would never tell anyone how to run their blog, or their life. I just thought you should know that about me. *B

busy thinkin' stuff

So, my blog has kinda slowed down in the area of postage, eh? Sorry, to anyone who is or has been disappointed by that fact. Anyway, I just haven't been feeling it, as of late. No reason, really. But I had to get on here and post something, so that TMI post wasn't at the top anymore. Thanks for all the well wishes! And I'll keep you posted with as much info as you can stomach, because as P-dub would say I'm just "keepin' it real."

Now, this handsome little devil of mine has been keepin' me preoccupied, physically and mentally. I haven't been tending for a few weeks now, so it's just been me and him. Some days were hard and long, and boring without a play mate. But I've been getting back into the groove of things; of our buddiness. And I've really enjoyed it. How can I not? Look at that face!!!

(Lindsey captured him, perfectly)

I've also been thinking a lot about blogging, in general. The whole private vs. public debate... and guess what? I'm staying public. While I believe some may have some valid concern about going private (it is your blog after all, do as you will), I don't feel the same. I've made so many friends and met so many amazing and wonderful people throughout this community. But, I'm careful to not associate myself in certain circles, etc. Just to be safe. And really, a stalker? Stalking me? Puhlease! Who am I to stalk? Besides, the crazies could find me without a blog.

With that being said, I'm not one to divulge in my lifestyle as a mom. Yes, I just referenced the fact that we are trying to get pregnant. That's pretty personal. I realize that. But what I'm not going to do is post a million pictures of my child(ren) and list all of my daily routines. It's just not smart. What's more is that this isn't entirely a mom blog. Sorry to all the family out there who wants to read nothing more than how us Summers are doing, pictures galore et al. Yes, I'm a mom. Yes, I love being a mom. But I'm a mom all day, every day, 24/7. I don't feel like I have to prove how hard I'm trying to be a good mom. And I would go crazy if that's all I thought about. And that's why I craft. That's why I blog. Because I'm a person, too. Not just a mom.

Tangent over. And, I'm about to share a little of my mom side, so jump back (and feel free to call me a hypocrite)! As I was saying, I've been really enjoying my little boy. He's not a baby anymore. He's on the verge of becoming a real, live big boy. He's growing up before my eyes and if I'm not careful, I'm going to miss it! Just a few things he's been doing or saying to melt my heart:

• Talking. A lot. Things like, "Excuse me? Can I hold that?"
  
• Pretending. A lot. Like treasure hunts, making cookies and juice, etc.
• Playing. We play a lot of board games and we take a lot of walks. Just today we went on a bug walk where we kept our eyes' open for pill bugs so we could scare them into balls and then flick them (I know, I'm a mean mom and a bad example...).
• Baths. All the time. It's amazing (and wonderful) how much four inches of water, some bubbles and a couple of water guns will entertain a toddler.
• Crafts. I've been having a lot of fun making things. And so has Monk. I'm trying to really encourage his sense of creativity. We're already working on some needle-friendly skills. And I just received my wonderful win of a book: The Creative Family. I'm so excited to try out everything. Thanks Kim! And thank you, SouleMama.
• Mischief. The kid's got brains and he puts them to good use. He knows how to work our entire entertainment system. It's not only impressive that he can find and insert the DVD of his choice (which usually requires dragging a chair over and removing the previous movie), but it's also pretty miraculous how well the finger smudged discs play...
  
• Illness. The poor boy's been sick these past couple of days, which just breaks my heart. But of course he's been mostly sweet, laying on the couch for hours watching movies while mom re-reads her not-so-trashy vampire romance novels. I think he's on the mend, though. Whew.

And there you have it. My thoughts. And believe me, I have many more...
For another day. *B

busy makin' stuff

like blankets, hair clips, onesies, bibs, aprons and babies. Yes, you read right. Babies. No, I am not pregnant. But soon I will be! Here's hoping. For a baby...

It has indeed been six months since that awful, fateful day and we are now good to go. I've done lots of research this time around, to help ensure a good and healthy conception (and pregnancy). Let's hope it pays off, because I am so very ready for my baby.

Last week a friend of mine stated the obvious: "It's kinda hard to watch other people get pregnant and have babies when you're not." Uh, yeah, it kinda is. I have another friend, or two (or fifty), that are due either on or around my supposed due date, May 11th. That's less than a month away, people. If I were still pregnant I would be in that "it could happen any day now" stage. Crazy. But right now we're in the "wishin' and a hopin', thinkin' and a prayin'" stage. And then, then it's the "holding, and kissing, and squeezing, and loving" stage. Hopefully.

So yeah, we've been busy. *B

truly spoiled...

thanks to Joe!!!
So thanks. A lot! Seriously. *B

tugging at heartstrings

I am decidedly and irrevocably in love with crochet. I'm drooling over this and in serious need of this. I've been busting my fingers (and brain) as of late. And I'm having mixed feelings about knitting (and circular needles)... but my project is finally starting to show some progress-slash-promise! Better later/pretty than sooner/ugly, right? Let's hope so!

And thanks for the sneaky sweet emails. It was just one of those days, most likely because it's just one of those weeks [wink, wink]. I'm sure 70% of it was hormones ;)

Thanks to all the dear hearts out there that help mend my broken one. *B

giving up

I'm tired of being disappointed. I'm tired of being optimistic. I'm tired of being offended. I'm tired of being friendly. I'm tired of being replaceable. I'm tired of getting my feelings hurt. I'm tired of being the peacemaker. I'm tired of being reliable. I'm tired of being well-adjusted. I'm tired of having to prove myself. And I'm tired of being overlooked.

I'm just a human, who's been forgotten. Again. *B

{photo by Miss Robin}

i'm so not kidding

which is weird, because I'm a HUGE tease. But I'm just not feeling it today (of all days!!!). Oh well. However, I have this idea... the goal for the month: dine in, not out. I'm dead serious. So serious that I even made myself a button to remind me of my intentions. We need to save money. We need to be healthy.

How 'bout you? Anyone want to join me??? Feel free to grab the logo and then proudly display it, wherever it will be of service to you and your ambitions. We could be, like, a support group for each other, or something. No joke. *B

one year older...

Happy birthday to my dear mother! She's beautiful, as you can tell. What's more is that she's even better looking on the inside! She's always putting herself last. Always. She really is an angel.

And she's my best friend. *B

happy day(s)

Happy birthday to my daddy (yes, I still call him that. And you know what? I think he likes it...)!!! The big five-o, today. Wowza. It also happens to be my mother's bday in a few days. So here's a picture (or two) of both:

I'm pretty sure I have the cutest parents in the world.
I am one lucky daughter. *B

do you believe in miracles?

Because we sure as heck do! HE PASSED!!! Oh man alive, he passed. Whew. I think we're still numb from it all, but dang it, he passed! Thank you, thank you, thank you for all your thoughts and prayers. I know they were answered...

The test is split into two sections; two 50 question, 3 hour tests with a 30 minute break in between. According to Brad, he didn't do too well that first half. Each question was a doozy (we're talking like a full page for one question!) and the answers were near impossible to find. He feels like he had bombed it, it was that bad. So what did he do? He prayed for a miracle. And here's where you come in. Here's where God came in.

In all of the practice tests prior to that fateful day, the best Brad was getting was a 70%. Not great, but it was a passing grade and that's all that mattered (he only missed it by two points last time, bah). So he knew going into those last 50 questions that he needed to get at least a 90% in order to make up for the bombing before. You see where this is going? So he prayed. I was praying. We, you, were all praying. And God heard our prayers. Because each question on that second half was short and to the point. And each answer Brad either knew off the top of his head or was able to quickly find it in the MPEP, word for word. There was even one question (this gives me chills) where there were two very right answers. And he was distinctly "told" that this question was a trick question. It was a test question just thrown in there but would not count toward his overall score. Seriously. So he was able to move forward, answer each question and had 15 seconds to spare. And he believes, by the grace of God, that he got every question right. It was a flat out miracle.

And now he's a patent agent!!! He even gets a pay raise (he has a job at a local patent firm in Malibu, which is also a miracle in and of itself. It's perfect for him --for us as a family, really)! And now we can get rid of his pile of books (I don't even have a picture of the MPEP, but it's the size of those two yellow books put together. No joke.)! Hallelujah.

I cried out of relief and thanksgiving. It still makes me tear up. We are so blessed. So, so, so, so blessed.

Thank you. And thank God. *B

PS- I didn't win. But that would have been silly. I'm pretty sure I've reached my quota of blessings for the week...

something to occupy

my mind, that is. Although I would throughly enjoy my body occupying this quilt, cuddled up on my couch, watching Star Wars whilst knitting and sipping on some tea... today is the last day to enter this motherload of a contest! A fabulous quilt with Free Spirit fabric (LOVE it!) and some yummy handmade natural bodycare. Oh how I wish I could win it and call it mine. It would so make my day (my mind and my body, too) oh so happy. You can help, by hopping on over to the Old Red Barn Co. and mentioning my name ;)

I don't know if many of you know this about me, but I have a serious obsession with quilts. If I had the space (and money!), every closet would be stuffed with them. Sure, I've pieced a few in my day, mostly unfinished tops... but whether by my hand or the hands of others, assembled (and stippled) fabric makes me drool. We're talking some serious eye candy here, my friends. This infatuation I speak of, I'm pretty sure it's in my blood.

Anyway, today is THE day; Brad's taking his test as I type and I'm trying to find ways to keep me busy from fretting... yay for FAB quilts, blogging, knitting and miscellaneous chores! Hopefully we will have some happy news to share tonight... but in the meantime, keep sending those positive vibes! And thank you, very much.

Occupation over. *B